Crunk Sugar Free

A Fair & Honest Energy Drink Review

Crunk Sugar Free Retail Package Description

The Sugar Free Crunk!!! Energy Drink can is similarly designed to the regular Crunk Energy Drink, but the can is reflective "silver" in the places the original is red, and red where the original is black. The primary motto is still "Get Crunk!!!". The rim of the can reads, "replenish, stimulate, refresh, invigorate, arouse, energize". Under "Sugar Free Crunk!!!", the text reads, "Contains Real Pomegranate Juice", and, "With Ashwaganda".

Caffeine Addict's Crunk Sugar Free Review

After thinking the original was going to be a sham, but being very wrong, I was much more cautious consuming Sugar Free Crunk. I thought it best to not enjoy Sugar Free Crunk alone, but also not in the presence of anyone to whom I was remotely attracted. Unfortunately, Madonna was not available.

I really like the flavor, I taste the sodium a bit more in the Sugar Free version, but overall, it's tart and tasty. It's not terribly thirst quenching, but then, a space shuttle isn't very fuel efficient. This drink seems very carbonated to me, but I've found the more tart a drink it, the more carbonated it seems (Wink, Harris Teeter Traders Lemon Soda, Coolah, just to name a few). To me, Crunk isn't tart like lemons, but can still make your face pucker a bit.

Without being too detailed, this drink does what it says. It does everything it claims, without exaggerating the affects. The text on this can may be the most accurate ever written on a can by the manufacturer.

Between this drink and the regular, I'd probably drink the regular version, but if I was even remotely concerned with the 120 calories in regular Crunk, I wouldn't hesitate to drink the sugar free. Both drinks are first-rate, and debatably worth the full $1.99 price.

Energy Junkie's Crunk Sugar Free Review

Firstly, as with the original, this review is geared toward adults. I've attempted to fashion it in a way that's "family friendly", but this product, and consequently the review, deal with topics that are adult in nature.

To elaborate on my original review, Urban Dictionary's highest ranked definition of "Crunk" is in part as follows:

Whatever it is, it means getting really crazy and *messed* up. And with Conan's introduction of the word to northern suburban audiences, Crunk came into its own as the recognized sound of the new generation of Dirty South Rap, prompting white college fratboys everywhere to wander around going "WHHHUT!! OKAAY!! YEEEAAHHH!!" like annoying *rectal seepage*. and it's all thanks to Lil Jon, and by Lil Jon I mean Dave Chappelle.

Fortunately, I was able to find a video on youtube demonstrating this particular behavior. While I have no idea why this video was ever made, I am pretty sure no one should ever watch it. On the other hand, everyone involved probably thought this would explode them into star status with the frat mattresses.



Since ishkur's definition seems pretty spot on to me, I'll stick to my original statement with the footnote that Crunk!!! Has the potential to get your crazy, but the *messed* up part seems out of reach, from my experience.

Furthermore, Lil Jon himself defines crunk as "A lifestyle" and "A state of mind where you almost goin' crazy, but you're not crazy".

So, is it good? Regis Philbin says of Crunk, "I'm getting to like it, I'm even having feelings I never recognized before". The Ying Yang twins suggest that you should, "Grab a Crunk if you want to get crunk like Lil Jon and say, 'YEAH!'".

While Regis is probably just too old to remember those feelings, most consumers of Crunk will have no problems identifying them (but may have problems muddling through them). This drink is on the mark, only 5 calories, nearly as tasty as the original. The pomegranate flavor comes through in the sugar free, it's delightfully tart, and unquestionably affective.

While I'd say the "energizing" is less profound than the "arousing", that deadly combination in the hands of a 12-15 year old boy could result in the deflowering of millions of Mattel branded fashion dolls. Normally I'd suggest keeping this out of the reach of children, instead, I'd suggest you not keep it in the house with children, and if you don't have children, and you keep it in the house, soon you'll have children.

This is a well-formulated drink, and while I stick to my guns that the price is too high for my liking, it could be a cost effective solution for people who have a harder time, "getting in the mood". I'm not claiming this is a magic drink that cures all sorts of issues (for which psychiatric consultation and prescription medication may be the proper solutions), but in my opinion, this lives up to it's claims to "stimulate" and "arouse".