Java Monster Coffee Mean Bean

A Fair & Honest Energy Drink Review

Java Monster Coffee Mean Bean Retail Package Description

Fashionable coffeeish print on the can, with a very "natural" feel. "Java Monster. No foam, extra hot, half-caf, no-whip, non-fat, soy latte. Enough of the Coffee House BS already! It's time to get out of the line and step up to what's next. Java Monster...premium coffee and cream, brewed up with killer flavor, supercharged with Monster energy blend. Coffee done the Monster way, wide open, with a take no prisoners attitude and the experience and the know-how to back it up. Java Monster...half the caffeine of regular coffee, Twice the Buzz!" Hold on, did they just say "half the caffeine"? What a selling point, sounds as convincing as, "Vespa...half as cool as a Geo Storm", or "Anna Kournikova...half the tennis player of Maria Sharapova". And what's with the "..."? Is there a place I can get the text that you took out? You don't have to paraphrase yourselves.

*Correction: Originally, we reported that Java Monster Energy Drinks contained 16 fluid oz. per can, the contents have been updated to the correct amount, 15 oz.

Caffeine Addict's Java Monster Coffee Mean Bean Review

I don't remember "Java Monster" from the Sesame Street, but I'm assuming he was the Cookie Monster's affluent half black, half Russian cousin who was always looking to "score a piece". If he was looking to score "Mean Bean", I couldn't say I would blame him. This stuff tastes really good, like a melted coffee milkshake with an extra shot of "tastes good sauce". Very creamy and smooth, there's almost no coffee "bite" to this drink. Just knock-back good refreshing coffee goodness.

I felt pretty good after consuming this product. Just like the rest of the Monster line of products, this drink does not disappoint. Hansen Energy just knows what they're doing, and I look forward to trying the other 2 flavors of Java Monster.

Without question, this costs too much. Like the Million Dollar Man used to say, and probably still does, "Every man has a price". Well, "Every man also has a price limit", and mine is $2, for the most part, even for a 16 oz. drink. This energy drink is so lavishly overpriced, that even Jon Edwards would think twice about buying one of these to drink, and 4 cases to power his gargantuan house. If you can find them on sale, if not, wait until they become WIC approved, so those of us who are "less fortunate" can afford them.

Energy Junkie's Java Monster Coffee Mean Bean Review

I was concerned when I heard that Java had made a coffee drink. I mean, didn't Starbucks trademark coffee and the names of all coffee related products around the time that AOL bought the internet? "Someone could get in trouble here", I thought. Soccer moms the world over might be confused to hear that there are competing coffee beverages. This could result in a bake sale to raise money to bring back "Sex in the City" and ban all non-Starbucks coffee/tea/Italian soda products. At the risk of causing a riot, I reached right past the bottled frappuccino, and grasped hold of a Java Monster Mean Bean. I proceeded to the register, and ponyed up nearly $3. Things weren't looking so good, maybe instead of "half the caffeine", Monster should have considered making it "half the price".

Well, once I got to the public flogging I was attending that day, I popped the top on my iced cold coffee beverage, and it was...AWESOME! It tasted like...WOW! Java Monster...the secret to life. Well, I think the "..." says it all.

Even with "half the caffeine", Java Monster provides a reasonable "feel good" kind of energy boost. I felt like I could accomplish things, like picking at sores on my legs repeatedly until they opened and began to fester.

Without question, the price is too high. One of the priciest products we've reviewed, at nearly $3, this is the Aston Martin of the canned/bottled beverages available in a gas station cooler. I've found that the majority of the populous is more comfortable parting with $175,000 for the ultimate British sports and luxury car than I'm willing to part with $3 for the ultimate in canned coffee energy beverages.