Plasma Fusion Energy

A Fair & Honest Energy Drink Review

Plasma Fusion Energy Retail Package Description

The front of the Plasma can is very busy. It seems like the can designers had a hard time deciding what direction to go. The front of the can alone features 5 font faces. Graphically, it's mostly black, with a silver vertical streak up the center. Inside the strip, in an Atari-like font and bright chartreuse/lime color it reads, "Plasma". Above "Plasma", in muscle-car nameplate font, "protective energy mixer", this font (but in outline mode) may also be what "Fusion", which appears to the right of "Plasma", is written in. Then, in silver and some sort of hand-written font face, "Energy". Around the rim of the can, in an Arial-type font, "Acai Berry, Milk Thistle, Prickly Pear, Zeolite". At the bottom, "16 fl. oz./473 ml." Oh bother, on the back is a volume that makes me wish they made can scanners with OCR. I better go use the bathroom and get a snack before I start typing this...

Ok, I'm back, and a couple of Volcano Burritos lighter. Here's what Plasma verbosely has to say about their energy mixer, "Plasma Fusion Energy was designed specifically to be mixed with alcohol. The taste of Plasma Fusion was cerefully tweaked so that when mixing alcohol, you get a perfect fusion, without a harsh aftertaste", [YAWN][STRETCH], "The ingredients of Plasma Fusion were handpicked to combat the negative effects of alcohol. From helping to prevent hangover to liver protection, our patent pending blend of Acai Berry, Milk Thistle, Prickly Pear, and Zeolite have been added and Taurine removedto make the perfect protective energy. Plasma Energy, 'Lab rat recommended'. Please drink responsibly." Is it over? I must have dozed off, what did I miss?

Caffeine Addict's Plasma Fusion Energy Review

OK, so, we don't review "energy mixers". I can only imagine this branding is intended to accommodate some niche market. Meanwhile, I'd prefer drunk people feel drunk, instead of driving home after getting royally pissed at the local watering hole, because Plasma helped, "combat the negative effects of alcohol". Interestingly, this company makes an energy drink, the only product not made available to us. So, like I told the guy who makes energy bloody mary mix, I'll drink it straight up, and review it.

I'd hoped to show a Youtube video to demonstrate this, but only 7-9 minutes clips were available, and I'm a firm believer that no Youtube video should be longer than 2 minutes. But, if you're a Futurama fan, you'll get my analogy, If Red Bull was regular Slurm, Plasma Fusion Energy tastes like Ultra-Condensed Super Slurm. Thick enough to shovel in your mouth with your hand. Unfortunately, Fry's propensity to drink Super Slurm indicated that it tasted extra pleasant. I'd described Plasma Fusion as average, at best. IMHO, Plasma Fusion is about 3 extra tablespoons of water from being a can of hard candy.

It's energizing, if you can drink the whole can. Almost every attempt I made ended with half a can of flat soda. The only way it was drinkable, to me, was to put it over about 12 moon-crescenty- ice pieces and let if melt about half way. This made it seem more like you were drinking fluid instead of Plasma. Even though I think "plasma" the fourth state of matter, chemically speaking is actually more akin to a gas, Plasma may be the 5th state of matter, which is somewhere between a liquid and a solid.

I think Plasma costs too much, doesn't serve a practical purpose for the majority of our readers (people interested in energy to do productive things, not save their liver from binge-drinking), and offers only a reasonable helping of energy.

Energy Junkie's Plasma Fusion Energy Review

It tastes like syrup, a lot like I'd imagine the urine of a gamer who drank Mountain Dew and sweat a lot would taste like. It also makes your wee bright colors, which shows up more obviously on your white toilet lid cover when you stumble into the toilet half-asleep and realize that your barbaric wife forgot to put the seat up, like a civilized human being.

As an energy drink, Plasma performs up to par. It has an interesting mix of ingredients, comparable in uniqueness to Crunk!!! or Pimpjuice Anti-Oxidant Energy Drink. The notable difference being that both Crunk and Pimpjuice both taste great.

From myspace, we followed a link to buy Plasma. There, we found cases of 24 drinks for $39.99. Shipping to our address was $12.95, so total, you've got $2.20/each tied up in each 16oz. can of Plasma Fusion Energy. Too rich for my blood, and aside from being pricey, it's simply not to my liking.