Krank'd Body Fuel Peach Tea

A Fair & Honest Energy Drink Review

Krank'd Body Fuel Peach Tea Retail Package Description

The bottle is unassuming enough. It's pretty much a plastic bottle with a black cap. The label is pretty standard as well. The front label has a big gear on it. I'll admit, the wording has me confused as to whether I actually have the name of the drink correct. If you read it top-left to bottom-right (comic book style), the name should be "get 7in1 Krank'd Body Fuel", but I think the colors are supposed to indicate that I read the beveled/bold black outlined yellow text "get Krank'd" first, then the solid white/bold black outlined text "7in1 Body Fuel". Finally, and the reason I went with this name, is that all websites (including the manufacturer's) lists the product name "Krank'd Body Fuel" or "Krank'd 7in1 Body Fuel". I think the "7in1" is superfluous information.

Otherwise, the label looks like the bottle is cold and "sweating", to look extra refreshing. In the bottom left corner there is an icon that looks like a peach with a few leaves from a tomato plant, with the text "Peach Tea". The bottom of the label has a red stripe with some white text that reads, "Only 37 calories per bottle". Other noteworthy text on the bottle, "No high frutcose corn syrup-no taurine", "non-carbonated" and "16.9 fl.oz./500ml"

The back of the bottle goes on to explain the "7-in-1 body fuel":

  1. B-Vitamin Complex - B-Vitamins Fuel the Body
  2. Minerals - Enhances Electrolyte Function
  3. Electrolytes - Ensures Cellular Hydration
  4. Antioxidants - Detoxification Reduces Fatigue
  5. L-Glutamine - Expedites Muscle Repair & Recovery
  6. Reverse Osmosis (RO) Water - RO Filtrated Purified Water
  7. Tri-Carb Blend - Improves Stamina and Endurance


Lastly, on a small inconspicuous area on the side, there's a section, written in the smallest font considered human-readable ever printed, that reads (and I didn't see it until now, probably because the tinyness), "Shake Well. Our blend of high performance vitmains and minerals may settle, causing ringing or color variations. Please store out of direct sunlight."

Caffeine Addict's Krank'd Body Fuel Peach Tea Review

If I've been working in the yard, the heat index is 110, and there's an ice cold Krank'd Body Fuel in the fridge, I can guzzle about half of it before my primal need for hydration ceases to squelch my flavor sensibility. As soon as the semi-subdued cough-syrupy flavor registers, my lips seal shut like a kid presented with liquid Nyquil. Chugging it was the only way I finished the bottle. In fact, I drank half of it, it got warm, and I had to re-chill it to finish it.

Like the Stig, I missed the energy entirely. Perhaps it all settled to the bottom, and my failure to read the 4.5pt font "Shake Well" recommendation caused me to only get the non-energizing, unappetizing 99.94% of the contents ingested.

If there's a market for Krank'd Body Fuel, I have a pantry full of other ill-contrived drink samples I'd like to sell to that market. The only two possibilities I can see are selling Krank'd to body builders so desperate for results they'll buy and choke down anything (unlikely, since Speed Stack Pumped actually tastes good, is a reasonable value and is affective), or just try to liquidate it ASAP at Dollar Tree, Big Lots, Family Dollar (AKA "The Full Throttle Nature is One Bad Mother Exit Strategy").

Energy Junkie's Krank'd Body Fuel Peach Tea Review

Krank'd Body Fuel has a lot of things going for it, a name that sounds almost like "Crunk", dozens of supplement components that we can't pronouce and lots of words on the label. What it doesn't have going for it is three fold, #1. Any energizing affect, #2 A taste that's enjoyable and #3 a price that begins to account for the previous 2 shortcomings.

I don't know what in here is supposed to actually fuel my body. They nebulously mention caffeine on the label, but my body didn't find any (at least any more than was in the tea leaves). I'm sure it's more energizing than water, by how much is the question. I managed to stay awake and moving for a couple of hours after I drank Krunk'd until I was able to get to a store and buy a Rockstar Energy Drink

Let me start by sharing my confusion about a product by "Just be Natural" being sweetened with Sucralose and Acesulfame Potassium (two artificial sweeteners). Even with freehanded smatterings of these robust (200-600 times sweetness of sucrose) sweeteners, the herbal/medicinal flavors make their way through. My taste buds want to immediately reject Krank'd Peach Tea as soon as it enters my face portal.

Krank'd is available online for the undignified price of $2.49/per bottle (with free shipping if you buy a case of 12).